Something Big

I went to a CD release party at one of the churches I go to in Denver last weekend. It is my "rock and roll" church. Really cool vision. Great music. The following are some words from John Waller's song "Something Big".

I wanna see something
I've not seen, something so big
I wanna be a part of something great
greater than me

It's time to dream big dreams
to see your vision become reality
cause it's for you
by you
and those who love you wanna do

Something so big it's destined to fail without you Lord
something so great, it takes a miracle to do
We, your children wanna do something big for you
we are gonna sing a brand new song
something so strong
we will be the sound that wakes the dawn
something so loud
it's time for breaking through
there are no limits
for he who holds the truth

When I was listening to this song and singing, I felt like I was back at Youth Specialites. The one time in my life where I felt ready to go anywhere, and be anything, and make any sacrifice for Christ, and have the faith to know that it would all work out.

I also sit reminded of an email that one of my friends sent me a week ago in response to my latest posts.

She said, "You keep saying how BIG your God is, and you are right and that is awesome; but...what if he is big enough to move you to do something totally different? You talk about moving to SF and staying in Denver in several different respects, but have you thought of anything else? Or, rather, has he told you anything else? I've been considering lately that sometimes our big God asks for little changes and sometimes he blows our minds. I hear you talk about what you could do. What can't you do? What would you never imagine? Pray about that too."

I did not apply to SF. I'm glad I didn't. But should I be so quick to settle in Denver? The only place I've ever really wanted to move to other than Denver is Michigan, so in some ways I am open to that. Or, maybe God is just asking me to be bold here in Denver and take a different direction. BUT what if God wants to rock my world? What if I've lost the faith I had a few years ago? What if I'm settling for muted love instead of a contagious, radical, forever-in-love-with-Christ, nothing-else-matters type of love?

I'm not going to be teaching 4th grade at DC next year. That sucks. But I can either sit here and mope, or see this as an opportunity to move on with joy and anticipation at whatever lies ahead.

I'm scared and excited.

Blessed Be the Name of the Lord! He WILL be FAITHFUL!